It’s Friday the 13th and my life feels like it’s straight out of a horror flick.
There are personal things that brought me into farming. And today I feel that same overwhelming need to just connect with something that doesn’t seem so totally insane.
Yes, I deal with massive depressive. Between family court and medical complications, I struggle everyday to stay up beat and positive. My animals are therapy, every single one of them.
Unfortunately, therapy isn’t enough sometimes. It’s just not. Days like today, it feels like I’m in a fog of confusion. Barely able to breathe.
Every task seems overwhelming. It sucks.
I know I have to trudge on. I have little kids waiting to see a live feed of pigs this morning. My excitement from two days ago has waned but I still want to do this for them.
It makes me so sad to know that I’m not able to give them 100% like I should be able to. Of course that brings me down even further. Downward spirals suck too.
I’ll post the link later. Right now, I need to go lug some feed and do my chores. I’ll update more later today when I have the time. Wish me luck!